New Clogs vs Chest Tube

I found the perfect clogs.  They were so comfy.  Did I mention that they were perfect. Beautiful shiny black paten leather, light weight, I was in shoe heaven.  I was gracefully and comfortably gliding to the busy ER, no discomfort.  My feets were happy.

I went into check on a patient who was complaining of coughing for a few days and shortness of breath.  He had taken off his oxygen, and his oxygen saturation was looking crappy.  

Like a good nurse I chat with him for a moment and then listen to his lungs, or should I say lung.  

That's right he only had lung sounds in one lung.

I find an attending physician and alert him to the pneumothorax (collapsed lung),  but the doctor doesn't look phased, no blinking of eyes, no getting up from his chair, he didn't even send a resident over.  So I order a stat chest X-ray and beg the tech to pull it up in the ER for me.  How I love digital technology.  

My hunch was correct-- pneumothorax!  So I grab a resident, ask him to read the xray to confirm the diagnosis (because I'm a silly nurse and I can't diagnose anything).  I quickly walk over to the lazy unimpressed attending to tell him that "the patient has a pneumo."  

"How do you know", he asks.  

"I ordered a chest xray and it shows one, and there's that whole no lung sounds thing", in a slightly smart assed tone. 

He gave me the oh shit look and got up, quickly walked over to the patient and took a listen, then walked over to the computer to check the X-ray.  

So now it was time to fix the problem at hand.  

I gave the patient some pain meds, explained to him that he needed a chest tube and what a chest tube was.  I got the equipment set up.  Now we were just waiting for a doctor to show up, but I had on my comfortable new shoes.

So the resident comes bouncing over and looks thrilled.  How they love to put in chest tubes.  

So Resident A begins putting in the chest tube.  He has a medical student and an intern at the bedside with him.  He in on the bad lung side and I am on the other, holding the patient's hand and talking him through the process.  The patient is doing well, suddenly I hear the splash of fluid hitting the floor.   It's a lot of fluid.  Realizing the residents on the other side are fumbling with the pleurovac and seeing the floor covered in fluid I move over to the other side of the bed, my new clogs are splashing in the lung juice.  I  hook up the chest tube to the pleurovac.

"Thanks I owe you", the resident says.  

"Yes, you do to the tune of about $120 for a new pair of clogs".